Grilled Polenta with Spinach & Mushrooms

It's been so long! You don’t call… you don’t write… so sad. But I love you anyways, so here’s another installment of something that was con-cocted over the weekend. Since it’s grillin’ time, we shall implement the grill for this.

Large Polenta log ( in the pasta section usually)

Large bunch of spinach

Cremini mushrooms

2 cloves garlic

2 tbsp butter

Salt/pepper

To concoct ( makes about 15):

Slice the polenta log into ¼’ thick circles. I hope you had the good sense to remove it from its plastic condom before slicing. Brush with olive oil on both sides, salt/pepper. Grill each side directly on the grates, about 6 min/ side. Set aside. Sautee sliced mushrooms w/ 1 tbsp butter until nice and tan, remove from pan, salt. BTW – a secret to a nicely browned mushroom is #1) do not crowd the mushrooms, #2  -use medium high heat, #3 – salt AFTER they cook. Otherwise they release moisture in the pan and never brown, just grossly stew. But I digress…. Remove the mushrooms, sauté minced garlic until fragrant in the other tbsp. butter, and throw in some spinach until wilts, about 3-4 mins. Add more butter if you want, and make a mental note to run 2 extra miles next time. Once spinach is sautéed, pour out the spinach water from the pan. Add mushrooms, salt/pepper to taste, and top the polenta circles with some-of- dat. This is pretty freakin’ good hot or cold. Miss you, love you, call me, we'll lunch!

*Credits to Tomas Smit for the idea! 

Semi- Jerk Chicken Drumsticks

Hello! Welcome! Or rather, I welcome myself back after some time away of not eating. I have something easy for ya’ll today, but this one you have to have a food processor. This cray –hot marinade sauce just doesn’t work any other way, people. So go buy one already.

*Eric: the rosemary sprig in the picture I stole from your garden. Sucker!

Yee shall need:

10 chicken drumsticks, skin removed – or not. I remove the skin.

10 scallions

1 Habanero chile (or a Scotch Bonnet, if you like fire), seeds removed & coarsely chopped

2 tbsp white vinegar

1tbsp thyme( fresh or dried)

1 ½ tsp Allspice

1tbsp salt

½ tsp black pepper

Oil or cooking spray for broiler pan.

Ok. This is what: throw everything but the chicken stumps in the food processor, pulse to death to a pasty obedience. Marinate the chicken stumps in this for about 30 minutes. Preheat broiler to HI, put oven rack in the center of the oven. Hopefully you remembered to do this before preheating the oven, and get to keep your eyebrows and facial skin. Spray broiler pan or oil it up so the chicken don’t stick, slick. Arrange drumsticks in the broiler pan, salt thoroughly some more. Broil on HI (turning once or thrice) for a total of about 30 mins, until delicious charred crusties form. Enjoy, but I caution: this is just as spicy on the way out, as on the way in. Cray!

Raw Shaved Asparagus salad with Avocado

So here’s a little something’-somethhin’ from the “no-cook-vegan” part of our cookbook. Raw Shaved Asparagus salad with Avocado. The asparagus was getting kinda hairy, so we shave it. Just kidding. Super easy & tastes like a grassy knoll. Looks pretty on a plate though! 1 bunch (about 14) thick asparagus stalks makes 5 servings. Trim about 2” of the tough asparagus ends, and shave each stalk into thin ribbons with a vegetable peeler. Squeeze 2 tbsp of fresh lemon juice and add olive oil to a large bowl, add asparagus, salt & pepper to taste, mix and let marinate in the fridge for about a hour, mixing occasionally.  Serve with few slices of avocado, and enjoy your pee as a bonus. 

Rice Crispy Treats on steroids

Is it possible to develop objectophilia (...a pronounced emotional and often romantic desire towards developing significant relationships with a particular inanimate objects (Wiki)) towards a desert? Apparently it is.

I don’t know what it is about me and marshmallow-based deserts lately, must be that time of the month…. anywho…These pieces of goodness will make you love them at first bite, or at the very least put you into a sugar coma. 

 To make about 16-18  2x2 squares yee shall need:

2 heaping cups marshmallows, large or small

2 cups Rice Krispies cereal

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

½ cup dried cherries or cranberries

½ cup crushed thin pretzels

½ cup semi-sweet chocolate chips

1 cup grated coconut, divided into 2 equal parts.  

Toast the coconut in the oven on 375 until golden brown, about 3-4 mins. Reserve ½ cup for later. While you are saliva-ing over the smell of toasted coconut, crush pretzels into small pieces; I like to do that by putting the pretzels into a zip lock bag and beating the crap out of them with something heavy. Pretzels crushed, I feel better, and 7 calories burned. Win-Win-Win.. Melt the marshmallows over medium/low heat stirring often for about 7 min.until fully melted, then incorporate vanilla extract. Remove from heat, add rice krispie cereal, ½ cup toasted coconut, dried cherries, crushed pretzels, and mix everything until evenly mixed. Working quickly, dump the whole sticky mess into a 9 x 13 parchment paper lined pan. When lining the pan with parchment paper, do yourself a favor and have enough there to close the parchment over the pan once the contents are in the pan. Press down over the parchment so the rice crispy mixture is of uniform thickness. You’ll need to let it cool completely, which  - you eager beavers - takes about 30 minutes. You can put in the fridge to cool faster if you must. Once the rice sheet cools, cut it into squares.(I hope you removed the parchment first). In the mean time occupy yourself by melting the chocolatechips in a bowl set over a simmering pot of water until fully melted. Dip one side of each square into the melted chocolate, then into the remaining toasted coconut. Let cool completely before serving. Enjoy your objectophilia!  

Shrimp Ceviche

It’s Shrimp Ceviche people! The ultimate no-cook summer treat!! Freakin’ tiny shrimp!!! Yay!!!!.... You’ve probably noticed that I’ve been lazy lately & don’t really feel like turning on the stove, so you’ve seen me post stuff like those marshmallow 5-minute owl faces... So if you’re like me right now – then this should be right up your alley. This could not be easier to make. Well, I guess it could be easier to make, if you just float all the ingredients whole in a bowl of lime juice, but hopefully you will give your guests the courtesy of a small dice at this par-tae.  Typically the recipe calls for cucumber, I didn’t have any so I used a tomato here. Whatevs, it’s still good.

You will need:

• 1/2 cup (preferably fresh ) lime juice 
• 1 lb tiny cooked shrimp.
• 1/2 red onion, diced  
• 1 jalapeno, diced very small
• 1/3 cup chopped fresh cilantro
• 1/2 cup ketchup (or chili sauce)
• About 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 cup seeded diced peeled cucumber
• 1 small ripe but firm avocado,  cubed
• Salt
• 
  

Toss the shrimp with lime juice, cover and refrigerate for about an hour. In a small strainer, rinse the onion under cold water, then shake off the excess liquid, ‘cuz you be cryin’ otherwise. Add to the shrimp bowl along with all other ingredients. Taste and season with salt. Cover and refrigerate if not serving immediately. BAM!  Serve with tortilla chips, or whatever other scooping agent you find palatable. PS: you can also substitute firm white fish like sea bass, if you have a fatal allergy to shellfish, or if you’re fancy. 

S'more treats

OMG people, here’s a treat for you. If you’re having “one of those nights” I suggest you sweep your pantry, and give yourself a mouthgasm with these.(Side note: the word “mouthgasm” is underlined in red, a.i. “not a word” according to Webster. As I right clicked to spell check it, it corrected to “Mouthwash”. Fail!)

All you need:

Crackers, broken in 2

Large Marshmallows, cut into circles

chocolate chips

5 minutes.

Assemble. Broil on low for a few minutes, not leaving the site. Remove. Notice how they stare creepily at you. Gorge. Regret. Gorge some more. WIN!  

Chicken & Wild Rice Soup

Hellooooo my peeps! I am back! Technically I was here all along, successfully ignoring your cries for more blog. But I have missed you, and soup, and so it goes like this: today we are making Chicken & Wild Rice  Soup. It’s so easy even a monkey can do it (yea, I’m talking to you.. you know who you are…). 15 minutes hands on, then it pretty much cooks itself.  

Yee shall need: 

  

2 large chicken breasts

1 yellow onion

2 cloves of garlic, chopped

3-4 cups chicken stock

½ cup dry wild rice  

1 can of chopped stewed tomatoes  

1 large carrot or 2 small ones, cut into circles

½ cup frozen corn kernels. 

Salt & pepper to taste

Crushed red pepper

3 tbsp lemon juice

Parsley ( flat leaf or curly, whatevs. )

Cut up chicken into mouth-manageable cubes (no larger than 1”).  Season chicken well with S&P. ( Notice my “Rachel Ray” EVOO approach to salt & pepper here).  Chop the onion and garlic, and brown with the chicken in a large soup pot with some vegetable oil for about 10 minutes on medium heat, until chicken has a nice base tan. Add the chicken stock to the same pot; add more water if need more liquid. Throw in dry wild rice, tomatoes, corn, & carrots. Add 1/2 tsp crushed red pepper and about 4 tbsp chopped parsley.  Cover, bring to boil, turn down heat and simmer on LOW about 40 minutes. Remove from heat, add salt / pepper to taste if needed, and about 3 tablespoons of lemon juice. Let stand covered for about 20 mins. to an hr.

Serve with fresh chopped parsley, and more crushed red pepper if you like ulcers.